Three women: one engaged, one married and one a mistress, are
chatting over lunch and conversation turns to their relationships. They
decided that night to surprise their men. All three would wear a black
leather bra and thong, stiletto heels and a mask over their eyes.

A few days later they meet up for lunch.

The engaged woman: The other night when my boyfriend came over
He found me with a black leather bodice, tall stilettos and a mask. He saw
me and said, 'You are the woman of my dreams. I love you.' Then we made
love all night long.

The mistress: Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was wearing the leather outfit, heels, mask over my eyes and a raincoat. When I opened the raincoat he didn't say a word, but we had wild sex for hours.

The married woman: I sent the kids to stay at my mother's house
for the night. When my husband came home I was wearing the leather bra,
black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes. He walked in the door,
looked at me and said,

'What's for dinner, Batman?'

John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmicks.
His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change.
One day John came home with another one of his unusual purchases. It
was a robot that John claimed was actually a lie detector. It was about
5:30 that afternoon when Tommy, their 11 year old son, returned home
from school.

[Read More!]

-!- Nick71974 [~dfghsfg@87-126-123-172.btc-net.bg] has joined #efnet
Nick71974 [~dfghsfg@87-126-123-172.btc-net.bg] requested unknown CTCP /MSG from #efnet: Nick71974 ...
<+au> shoo Nick71974
<+au> moron
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Visit gogoNET

The following is an actual question given on University of Washington chemistry mid term. The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, is why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well:

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

[Read More!]

I've always loved this ad, I think it's one of the more clever

I've never talked about this before, but I really need advice on what could be a crucial decision. I’ve suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me.

The usual signs… Phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up.
My wife has been going out with the girls a lot recently although when I ask their names she always says, “Just some friends from work, you don’t know them.”

I always stay awake to look out for her taxi coming home, but she always walks down the drive. Although I can hear a car driving off, as if she has gotten out of the car round the corner. Why? Maybe she wasn’t in a taxi?

I once picked her cell phone up just to see what time it was and she went berserk and screamed that I should never touch her phone again and why was I checking up on her.

Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife I think deep down I just didn’t want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to really check on her.

I decided I was going to park my motorcycle next to the garage and then hide behind it so I could get a good view of the whole street when she came home. It was at that moment, crouching behind my bike , that I noticed that the valve covers on my engine seemed to be leaking a little oil.

Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to the dealer?

A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City , where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates.

You may visit the store ONLY ONCE !

There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch . . .. you may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but
you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband.

On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men have jobs and love the Lord.

The second floor sign reads:

[Read More!]

13:39 <+graz> ls
13:39 < howto> Why don't you go outside and play a nice game of
hide-and-go-fuck-yourself?

16:26 <@graz> is that box a WINS server?
16:26 <@TechSmurf> yes
16:28 < Trey_> right now it's a FAILS server